Teeny Weenie Upside Down Bikini

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Life’s gone all topsy turvy on me. I’ve entered the upside world. Have I seen stranger things? Indeed I have, but this one could be the topper on the cake. In fact, this one could be the one that jumps out of the top of a cake and yells “SURPRISE!” while I’m left yelling “WHYYYY?” Lord have mercy on poor fashion choices made by people who don’t seem to know any better.

 

We’ve all seen our fair share of trends and fads, some better than others, but this one truly is something else. I’m putting my best foot forward to say a resounding NO! on the upside down bikini. It doesn’t fit, it doesn’t work, do the reverse of what Nike tells you to do and “just don’t do it.”

Any lady who opts to take the plunge in this little number certainly won’t be playing any beach volleyball, taking salsa lessons on the playa, hitting the water on a yellow flag day or possibly even lift an arm to signal to the waiter that she’d like a top up on her beach drink (“that’s okay, I’m fine.”). . .  certainly not without seriously weighing the risks.

The bikini top was designed to go right side up for good reason. I didn’t think a “this side up” label was required for a bathing suit, but perhaps it’s time to reconsider. I get that some of swimsuits are less obvious than others when it comes to putting them on (i.e. the bandeau or criss-cross top), but it only takes a millisecond to realize when you got it on wrong. And I’m guessing that’s what happened to the first person who tried the trend. I’m calling you out Valentina for an overdue swimtervention this season and to the Aussie company, Cantik, for encouraging this unsupportive, bizarre-o world trend.

Who says that just because the Instagrammers are doing it that you all have to as well. Jokes on who here?

My only hope is that this is one of those short-lived insta-fads that won’t evolve into the U-back to U-front swimwear.

This summer I would like to invite anyone who is contemplating this trend to think again my friend, think again. Beach please, I’m here for you. Friends don’t let friends take unnecessary risks. If you are going to do an upside down bikini, do it on the monkey bars only.  Need I say more?

Carolyn Bissett
www.thefashionfix.ca
@Carolyn843

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